


A Million Miles

by BBMarcello



Category: CW Network RPF, Supernatural RPF
Genre: Angsty Schmoop, Coming Out, Future Fic, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Kid Fic, M/M, Original Character(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-02
Updated: 2014-04-02
Packaged: 2018-01-17 22:14:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1404400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BBMarcello/pseuds/BBMarcello
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jensen comes out, hides out and has lots of arguments with himself. Meanwhile, the Chadmeister saves the day.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Another old fic, with no intention to cause insult or harm. There's a bit of discussed character death and some blink and you'd miss it Jensen/Chad so be duly warned!

“I didn’t intend on talking about this.”

“But you are, aren’t you?  Going to talk about it, I mean.”

“Yes, I am.”  He sat back, looked at her for approval as he pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his coat pocket and lit one.  “There’s no point hiding anymore, don’t you see?”

“Jensen, have you really thought about this?  About what it’ll cost you?”

He leant forward and tapped ash into his now empty cup on the table.  “Another blockbuster?  Don’t much care.  Lisa, I’m sick of blowing shit up or having a gun in my face.”

“They won’t-“

He gave her his best raised eyebrow.

“Okay, yes, you’re right, they will.  I just, I don’t understand why you would do this now?  Your last film stayed in the top spot for sixteen weeks.  Jensen, right now?  You can do no wrong in this town.”

“That’s it though, right now.  What about tomorrow or the day after that?  I can’t keep lying, to everyone round me and yeh, to that paying public out there.  Some’ll wanna haul me over the coals but some might just actually think ‘huh, never knew that, ah well’ and move the fuck on to the next piece a gossip.”  He blew out a few smoke rings and stared out the balcony doors.  He didn’t much care whether they ate him up and spat him out, he just wanted it to be done, wanted the lying to stop.

There was a knock at the door and Chris walked in, “they’re here, you ready?”

Jensen smiled softly at him, “as I’ll ever be.”   They both stood up, Lisa smoothing her skirt down.

“This goes anywhere too kinky and I’m stopping it.”

As the group walked into the room, he leaned over and whispered in her ear, “what would you consider too kinky?”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There was a lot to catch up on.

Pulling up outside the house, he got out of the truck and stretched, arms above his head, spine cracking.  Long, long drive.  The whole trip across had been long and boring, filled with a lot of Denny’s’ early bird specials and sleeping in boring motels.  He’d actually perked up when he hit traffic on the turnpike.  Finally, some angry, erratic drivers he could curse at, not just smiley families and trucks so big his knuckles turned white at the wheel.  He looked up at the house.  A four storey brownstone in Brooklyn with a decent view of the bridge at the end of the street, maple trees outside, not too shabby, not too shabby at all.  ‘Course he’d know what this place’d look like if he’d actually done the right thing and kept in touch but... nah, no use going over old ground now, it’d come up soon enough.  Now was the time to man up and go knock on that door, yep, right now.

Jensen walked up the steps and clonked the door knocker a few times.  No answer.  Crap, he hadn’t even thought that he might not be home.  Maybe he’d moved, double crap.  He leaned across and tried to see through the windows but they had wooden shutters facing down so he could only catch a glimpse of hardwood floor.  Should he wait?  He sat down on the top step and felt pretty foolish.  This plan was going fantastically.  A couple with a dog walked past and he pulled his cap down over his eyes, scraped his hand through his rapidly growing beard and hoped to hell they wouldn’t recognise him.  They nodded to him but kept walking.  Leaning against the stone banister he yawned loudly.  Shoulda got another coffee before he got here.  Least it was springtime.  It really wouldn’t be good to be found dead or hypothermic on some random steps in wintertime in Brooklyn.  He could see the headline now, ‘Jensen Ackles, down on his luck, found frozen to death with a forty in his hand’.  He shivered and looked up at the sun, closed his eyes and felt each freckle popping out to say hello.  He hadn’t closed his eyes for that long when he felt something poking his leg.  He opened his eyes and was greeted by two brown eyes, big as saucers, attached to a little girl with dark hair in pigtails.

“Are you a homeless man?”

“No?”

“Daddy said we should tell you to go to the shelter on 51st, they have good soup there.”

Jensen took off his cap, “I’m not homeless, I have a home.”  A cold uninviting one that’ll be surrounded by the press in less than 24 hours.

The little girl squirmed around, “are you  a gwizzly?”

He barked out a laugh, “no, I’m just a Jensen.”

Eyes big as saucers again and she turned and ran down the steps, her shoes clacking down the street.

“Daddy, daddy! It’s Uncie Jensen, daddy!”

Oh shit. 

Jensen quickly stood up and saw the little girl reach a tree, a tree that had two dogs and a Jared next to it.  Jared grabbed the little girl and hauled her up against him.  He couldn’t hear what was being said but he could hear her giggling as Jared pulled the dogs away from the tree and quickly walked towards the house.

“Jensen?”

The dogs came up the steps and sniffed round him, probably making real sure he wasn’t a ‘gwizzly’.  Jared reached the top step and put the girl down but held onto her hand.

“Jensen, what happened?  Why are you here?  What’s going on?  Is everyone okay?”

“And hello to you too, Jare.  How ya been?”

Jared looked exasperated, “are ya kiddin’ me?  God, look, come in, come in, we’ll talk, it’s so good to see you, I mean, god, how long has it been?”  Jared unlocked the front door and Jensen followed him in, the little girl hot on his heels and talking to the dogs.

Jared walked to the back of the house into a large kitchen, with windows overlooking a garden.  He took the leashes off the dogs and gave them some water.  “Kerry, go wash up and you can have some juice.”

She motioned for him to lean down and she whispered in his ear as he knelt down.  He looked up at Jensen, then cupped his hand over her ear and whispered back.

“Yay!  Okay, I’ll go wash now.  Dogs, mush!”  The girl skipped out of the room and one of the dogs, the Labrador, followed.  The boxer stayed put by his food bowl and whined.

“Okay, okay, here ya go.”  Jared went into a side room and came back with some kibble.

Jensen just stood in the kitchen, kinda stunned by all the domesticity.  Jared patted the boxer one last time as the dog demolished a bowl of kibble, then opened the fridge.

“Ya want some juice too?”

“Sure.”

“I got cranapple, cranberry and blackcurrant or just plain cranberry.  Sorry, Kerry’s on a cranberry kick right now.”

“Kerry’s your daughter?”

Jared just raised an eyebrow at him, “cranapple it is then.”  He poured three glasses out and put ice in two of them, passed an icy one to Jensen across the breakfast bar.

“Thanks.”  He sipped his drink and looked around.  Maybe he’d crossed into the twilight zone when he’d crossed the river.  He hadn’t seen any whirlpools in the Hudson or lightning strikes across the sky.  Weird though, very weird.

“What is?”

“Huh?”  Jared was looking at him expectantly.

“What’s weird?”

Jensen shrugged, “this, you, me, all of it.”

Jared shrugged back, “you were always weird.”

“Thanks!”  They smiled at each other for a beat too long, shaken out of it by Kerry coming back in.

“Kerry, ya going to greet Jensen properly?”

Kerry turned to Jensen and smiled, then curtsied.  “Good day Sire, my name is Kerry Paley Padalecki, I am quite pleased to meet you.”  She held out her hand and Jensen clicked his boots together, bowed and kissed the back of her hand.

“An honor, Miss Padalecki, my name is Jensen Ackles of Richardson and I have travelled a great distance to see you.”

Kerry pulled her hand back and giggled, “you’re silly.”

“Yes, yes I am.”

“Kerry, here’s your juice.  Go set up the board ‘n I’ll be in in a minute.”

“Okay, come on Fweddie.”  The boxer finally got his head out of his bowl and followed Kerry out of the room.

“Ouija board?  Bit young.”

“Doof, chess board.”  Jared sat on a stool and leant over the bar, picking up imaginary crumbs.  “So...”

“So...”  Jensen put his glass down and sat opposite him.

“Gonna tell me what’s going on?”

“I can’t visit an old friend?”

“Jensen, I haven’t seen or heard from you in ten years.  Well, I’ve seen you, in the Reporter and on the internet, on the billboards on Times Square.”

Jensen rubbed the back of his neck, “would saying I’m sorry help at all?”

Jared opened his mouth to answer but was interrupted by Kerry calling for him.  He stood up and held up a finger, “this discussion will be picked up later.  You gonna stay?”

“You invitin’?”

Jared rolled his eyes at him, “go get ya bags.”

Jensen turned to go.

“Jensen?”

He turned back to face Jared who was wiping the work surface down with a cloth, “it’s good to see you Jensen, really good.”

He smiled at him, “Yeh, you too Jare.”

 

As he hefted his bag from under the tarp of his truck, he realised something.  Jared hadn’t hugged him, not once.  In fact, he hadn’t touched him at all.  Jensen sighed; it was going to be a long twenty-four hours.

 

When he got back in the house, Jared shouted out, “leave ya bags in the hall, Jensen, we’ll sort them later.”  He followed his voice into the front room, a very tastefully decorated living room with cream walls and big squishy leather brown sofas that had seen better days.  There was also a big widescreen TV and an assortment of toys on the floor.  Jared and Kerry were sitting on the floor facing each other with a chess board between them.  They both looked up at him and it was like looking at two peas in a pod.  How had he missed this?  This whole life that Jared had had without him?

“Do you want to play?”

Jensen sat down on a couch behind Jared, “no thanks Kerry, I’m not very good.”

“Nor is Daddy, I win a lot.”

“Hey!  I win sometimes!”

“Daddy, silly, you only won once when you told me to close my eyes the whole time!”

Jared twisted round to face Jensen, “my daughter lies a lot”, he said in a solemn tone.

“Daddy!”  Kerry flung herself at him and sent the chess pieces flying, “I’m not a liar!”

Jared hugged her, “I know, babycheeks, I know.  Guess we’re done with the game, huh?”

Kerry climbed off Jared and lay down on the floor with her head against Freddie, “I was winning anyway.  Can I talk to Uncie Jensen now?”

“Sure, but not too long, he looks like he could sleep for a week.”

“Daddy, nobody can sleep for a week”, she rolled her eyes at Jared.

“I’ve seen your uncle try though.”

Kerry stood up and climbed onto the couch, sat cross-legged next to Jensen.  Jensen put on his most serious cross-examination face.

“Uncie Jensen, where do you live?”

“A long way away from here, in California.”

“But Daddy says you’re from Texas like him.  We drove to Richardson once, it was boring.”

Jensen looked over at Jared, who’d turned around and was lying with his back against the other couch, stroking the dog. 

“What were you doing there?”

Jared’s cheeks turned pink, “truck broke down.”

“Oh.”

Kerry poked his arm, “can I wear those?”

“Sure”, he pulled the leather bracelets off and put them on her wrists.

“Yay, like Xena!  Grrr!  Uncie Jensen, what do you do in California?”

“I’m an actor and a director, I make movies.”

“Like SpongeBob 3D?”

“Kinda.”

“Do you have any children?”

“No.”

“Do you have a girlfriend or a boyfriend?”

Jensen looked over at Jared with surprise but Jared was looking anywhere but at him.

“Neither.”

“Why not?”

“Don’t know, not met the right person, I guess.  He yawned and tried to cover it with his hand.

“Okay Kerry, I’m gonna get Jensen settled for a nap, he’ll be back later.”

Jensen stood up but Kerry grabbed his jeans, “pwomise?”

“Yes Kerry, I promise.”

===========

 

Jared leaned against the doorframe while Jensen rummaged through his bag on the guest bed looking for his shorts.

“She’s six.”

“Uhuh, she’s very good at it.”  He found his shorts and was about to drop trou when he remembered that this was new, family man Jared, not the old bff Jared.  “Erm, so, Kerry...”

“Towels, ya need towels, I’ll just-“

Jensen grabbed him by the arm and pulled him to sit down with him on the edge of the bed. 

“Come on man, please?”

Jared dropped his head, dark curls falling over his face.  He started talking to the floor.  “Okay, Kerry’s mine and Genevieve’s, well, was Genevieve’s.”  Jared looked up, unshed tears in his eyes.  “Jensen, Gen’s dead.”

“What?  How?”

“When we found out she was pregnant, we were both happy, ya know?  I mean, Kerry wasn’t planned and we hadn’t been back together for very long but I thought it’d be great.  But then Gen had a really hard time being pregnant, mood swings all over the place, bed-rest for a month, throwing up for nearly the entire time.  Still, I thought, you know, it’d be fine once the baby came, it’d all work out.”  He shook his head.  “When Kerry was born, Gen wouldn’t touch her, wouldn’t even look at her.  We got home and she stayed in bed all the time, I couldn’t do anything right and I tried, ya know?  I really tried.  Then...I came home from taking Kerry out for a stroll and she’d gone.”

“What?”

“Yeh, just skipped town, left a note, said she couldn’t do it anymore, said she was sorry.”

“Jesus.”

“Then I got the call two days later, her car’d been hit by a drunk driver, just outside Buffalo and that was it, she was gone.  I think it was post-partum depression but we’ll never know. When it happened, I was in bits, packed up and drove to Texas.  That drive did it, ya know?  I coulda given up but here was this l’il bit that needed me, all the time.  I cried across most of the country but by the time I saw my mom, I was manning up.  Kerry’s my responsibility and I was gonna take damn good care of her.  We’ve driven down to Texas for Christmas every year since...er, that’s why Kerry said about Richardson.”

Jensen didn’t want to mention that his home town was so not on the way to San Antonio.  He moved to hug Jared then thought better of it, pulled his fingers through the stray threads of the blanket on the bed. 

“I’m so sorry Jared, so sorry about Genevieve.”

“I’m okay, it was quite a time ago now and Kerry keeps me in the here ‘n’ now.  Speaking of”, he stood up, “I’ll let you get some sleep, s’enough soul strippin’ for one afternoon.”  He turned around at the door, “I’ll wake you up for supper”, then he shut the door and was gone.

As if on cue, Jensen yawned loudly.  He stripped off and pulled on his shorts, got into bed and lay back, properly taking in the room.  Another cosy room, well decorated but clearly a guest room with a desk and bookshelves lining the opposite wall, some dusty potpourri on the bedside cabinet.  Had Jared and Genevieve done all this together?  Found the house, made it a home?  Or had Jared moved after?  God, he was such a prick, he hadn’t known about any of it. Was he being selfish coming here?  Tomorrow, it’d be out and he’d be causing more drama for Jared...mmm, the bed was pretty comfy though.  But, if he left, would he just be another person walking out on Jared?  Though, hadn’t he already done that once?  He closed his eyes.  He’d think about all of it later, just needed a bit of sleep.  Then he was out.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reminiscing.

He woke up when he felt someone sit on the bed.  Kerry was sitting cross-legged with a Barbie doll in her hand, walking it across the covers.

“Yay, you’re awake!  Me and Barbie knocked on the door but you didn’t say anything so we came in and I shouted and you didn’t wake up – we were going to tickle you next.”

Jensen rubbed his eyes and sat up, “I’m awake.  Where’s ya daddy?”

Kerry jumped off the bed but left the doll behind, “he’s made supper and we’ve been waiting for you to wake up for ages.”

“Okay, tell your daddy I’ll be five minutes.”

“Okay!”  She ran out of the room.  Kerry was so Jared’s kid, he doubted that level of energy was going to dissipate anytime soon, not for at least another twenty years.

He pulled his jeans and shirt on and went in search of the bathroom.  It wasn’t hard to find, it was a bright blue tiled room with foam creatures stuck all over the walls and a little stool next to the sink.  He washed his face and looked in the mirror.  Same old Jensen.  He felt he should look different somehow, both in Jared’s house and so near him.  He rubbed his chest.  His heart hurt again, like it hadn’t done in nearly ten years.  He shouldn’t have come here but he was here now so?  So. 

 

Walking downstairs, he could hear them in the kitchen and he slipped out the front door, sat down on the bottom step and lit a cigarette.  He didn’t look over when Jared sat next to him.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”  Jensen blew out a smoke ring.

“Jensen, don’t run again, stay, just for a bit.”

“Again?”  He looked over at him.

“You know what I mean.  Just stay, okay?”

“I don’t wanna make things awkward for you guys.”

Jared took his cigarette out of his hand and took a drag, “now, how are you gonna do that?”

‘Cos tomorrow you’ll hate me again, he thought.

“Dunno.”

Jared took another drag and stubbed the cigarette out on the step.  “Come on, supper’s ready.”  He patted him on the knee and stood up, held out a hand for Jensen then pulled him into a hug.  “See?” he mumbled into his shoulder, “everything’s copasetic.”

Jensen closed his eyes and held on, “yeh, thanks.”

 +++

 

Jared had made a feast fit for a returning hero or, as he said, more enchiladas than man alone could eat.  Jensen did his best to conquer his plate but he hadn’t eaten that amount of carbs in a long time.  Clearly, Jared still ate like a racehorse.  Jensen answered more of Kerry’s questions over supper then asked her what school was like and she was off, bouncing up and down on her chair with excitement, talking about chess and playtime and how a boy called Tommy was her best friend in the universe.  Jensen shoulda felt old but he just felt happy that Jared was clearly doing a damn good job of being a dad. 

After supper, they took the dogs out for a walk.  Kerry held Jensen’s hand the whole time while Jared led the dogs and just watched their interaction with an amused grin.  Jensen found out that the Labrador was called Zelig and that the store on the corner sold the best pretzels but you had to get there early in the morning.  They walked along the prom and sat down on a bench.

“Do you know where we are?”

Jensen shook his head no and Jared pointed up at the bridge.

“You always did like geeky films.  Don’t you miss it?”

Jared smiled and shook his head, wrinkled his nose, “nah, I made enough to see us through for quite some time. Retirement can be good, ya know?”

Jensen sat and thought about the last couple of years, the little amount of time he spent in his own apartment, the long hours filming, the, constant pressure to keep up with the Hollywood machine.  He thought about their supper, he really missed carbs.

“And I do enough now, I volunteer at a coupla places, the shelter up on 51st twice a week, the animal shelter in the village twice a week.  The munchkin keeps me busy the rest of the time.”  Jared cocked his head toward Kerry who was playing with the dogs on the grass.

“You did good Jare, she’s a great kid, if a bit goofy like you.”

“Hey!”  He smiled and shoved his shoulder.  “But, yeh, she is a good kid, no idea how.  Kerry, come on, home-time!”

Kerry waved to the bridge and ran back over to them.

“Daddy, wave to the brokeen bridge.”  Jared waved and elbowed Jensen so he’d wave too.

“Ne-night bridge, sweet dreams!  Come on babycheeks, bedtime for you.”

As they strolled back to the house, Kerry asked, “daddy, is Uncie Jensen going to sleepover?”

“Yes Kerry, he is.  Is that okay?”

“Yes!”  She tugged Jensen’s hand, “Uncie Jensen, you can borrow my SpongeBob blanket if you want, it’ll keep you warm and snug as a bug!”

“Thanks Kerry,” he squeezed her hand, “I’d appreciate that.”

+++

 

Jensen stayed in the living room while Jared put Kerry to bed.  He could hear Jared’s awful singing filtering down the stairs; Old MacDonald had never been strangled so well.  He got up from the couch and had a look at the pictures on the mantelpiece.  There was one of Jared and Genevieve on a beach somewhere, a couple of Jared with Kerry as a toddler, one with his whole family, one of Kerry as she was now and, on the end of the mantel, next to a piece of rose quartz, was a framed photo of him and Jared, smiling up at the camera from Jared’s old couch.  Jensen remembered the day it was taken; they’d had a party as soon as he’d moved in to Jared’s house, fired up the grill, Mike had taken the picture, messing around and telling them to ‘ooze sex’ and ‘make lurve to the camera’.  Hence them both laughing their asses off in the shot.

“Hey, she’s asleep, finally.”

Jensen picked up the frame and turned to Jared, “Jare, I don’t understand.  Why is this here?”

Jared took the photo from his hands and put it back on the mantelpiece.

“Jare, why don’t you hate me?”

Jared sighed and shook his head, “Jensen, you’re a dope sometimes.  Okay, d’ya want some wine?”

“Erm, sure.”  He sat down on the couch and thought about how many different ways he could apologize to Jared, how many different ways he could say what he really felt, say it all before tomorrow.

“Here”, Jared came back into the room and offered him a glass of red wine, sat down next to him with his own glass.  He took a sip and turned to Jensen, resting his arm on the back of the couch.   “So, why do you think I should hate you?”  He put a finger to Jensen’s lips before he could speak.  “That was rhetorical.  ‘Cos ya ran out on a great show and a great partnership on screen?  Jen, that was ten years ago.  And I understand.  I mean, Jesus, no, I didn’t understand then, I was angry as hell at you.  I, erm, I cut up ya jacket.”

“What?”

“When Eric told me he’d had the final word from your lawyers, that that was it, you were out and off to the heights of movieland, well, yeh, I was fuming.  I trashed your old trailer, took a pair of scissors to Dean’s jacket.  I held a grudge, I really did, through the last episode without you, the early wrap party, swore that I’d hunt ya down and punch ya lights out.”

Jensen shifted slightly on the couch, away from Jared.

Jared smiled at him, “don’t worry man, I’m not gonna hit you.  ‘Bout a year after you left, I was still fuming, stupid DVD store put the wrong disc in the box and I ended up watching your film.  And dammit man, you were good, really good, reduced me to tears.  I wanted to call you, so badly, talk about it with you.”

“I wanted to call _you_ , so many times.  Jared, the movie thing got out of control, I didn’t wanna say goodbye to you guys, ya gotta believe that, I just couldn’t do it, I couldn’t turn down Scorsese.”

Jared squeezed Jensen’s shoulder, “I know, knew it soon as I watched that film, probably knew it all along, I was just too damn angry at the time.  After I watched that film, I forgave you, I really did.  The dogs sure were happy I stopped being such a grouch!”

“I figured they-“

“Yeh, about two years after you left, Harley died, doggie cancer.”  Jared let out a deep sigh.  “Sadie, she went not long after.  She wouldn’t eat.  Vet said twisted stomach, I still say broken heart.  Didn’t get Freddie and Zelig ‘til Kerry was a year old, couldn’t deal with it, ya know?  God Jensen, ten years is a hella long time to catch up on and there’s a lot of pain in it for me.  Come on man, I wanna hear all about you and the bright lights.”  Jared stood up and Jensen grabbed his hand, stood up next to him.

“Jared, I’m truly, truly sorry, for everything I put you through and everything you went through without me there to call on, I really am.”  He pulled him into a hug and held on tight.

Jared pulled away first and squeezed Jensen’s neck as he let go, “s’okay, honestly, a huge pile of water under a really big bridge.  Now, let me get that bottle of wine and you can fill me in on who Clooney’s doing these days.”

Jensen tried to smile back at him and rolled his eyes once Jared had gone out of the room.  He was starting to feel the next day plummeting towards him, inevitably crushing him and any hope of a rekindled friendship with Jared in the process.  He sat down and gulped the rest of his wine.  He just wanted more time like this, easy conversation and a touch of baring souls in the the way they’d always had.  He shouldn’t have come but now he was here, he couldn’t think of being anywhere else.

“Here ya go”, Jared came back into the room, filled his glass up and sat down next to him.  “So, come on man, what’s going on in _your_ life?”

Jensen chuckled, “not a lot really.  I’m waiting on pick-up times for my last movie, sifting through scripts now to see if there’s anything around...”

“That’s weak man, what about all the Hollywood gossip?  Who’s doing who?  The only news I get first hand is from Murray and he’s done everyone by now, twice over.”

Jensen tried not to think too long on that image.  “I bumped into him a while ago; he gave me your address.”

“I did wonder.  When I saw you in the street, I thought I was imagining things.  How was he?  I worry about him, ya know?”

“You shouldn’t, he was fine.  We, er, we hung out for a bit, talked n stuff, got drunk, the usual.”  Don’t ask me any more _please_ , he thought.

“Oh, he didn’t mention he saw you.”

Yeh, next day _he’d_ hoped he’d imagined it too. 

“No?  Well, anyway, erm, other things.  Tom’s getting another divorce, Mike is of course secretly thrilled.  Chris and Steve are prepping to go out on tour again soon, erm, that’s it really.”

“That’s it?  Thought you’d be hanging out with all the big players?”

“Nah, despite what the ragmags say, I pretty much keep myself to myself.”

“That’s it though man, the ragmags really don’t say much, you went and got respectable on them.”

Jensen ran his fingers through his hair, feeling instinctively for the thicker gray hairs, “happens to us all.”

Jared suddenly looked serious, “but, are you happy?”

Jensen put his glass down and stood up, “ya mind if I hit the hay?  S’been a long day” and, he thought, tomorrow’s gonna be even longer.

Jared stood up and put his hands on Jensen’s shoulders.  “Jen, you didn’t answer me.  Are you happy?”

Jensen shrugged and shook his head, pulled Jared’s hands down, “no.  G’night Jared.”  He left Jared by the couch and walked out of the room and up the stairs, shut the door to the guest room and slid down against it, put his head in his hands.  Jesus, this was too hard, way too hard.  After taking a lot of deep breaths in and out, he got up from the floor and pulled his boots and pants off, got into bed and set his phone alarm for six.  He wanted to be up and prepared before the magazine hit the newsstands.  He glanced over at his bag on the chair, prepared to leave again if it all went south.


	4. A complicated mistake - interlude

**_Eight months earlier_ **

_He got out of the bed and searched around for his jockeys, found them under the dresser.  Grabbing the rest of his clothes, he quickly got dressed in the bathroom, avoiding his own reflection in the mirror.  He’d so nearly gotten out of the bedroom._

_“You need to tell him, man.”_

_Jensen looked back at Chad lying in bed, his face squashed against the pillows, still half asleep._

_“No”, he said quietly, “I really don’t.”_

_Jensen heard a muffled “idiots” as he closed the bedroom door behind him._


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Panic stations!

“Kerry, get away from the window!”

Jensen woke up to Jared’s shout downstairs.  Dammit, his phone had been on vibrate, he hadn’t woken up and now it was, goddammit, ten o’clock!  Crapcakes.  He’d have to try to sneak out and find the nearest news stand.  He dressed quickly and pulled on a hooded sweatshirt, was going to sneak out the front door when he heard a ‘psst’ from the hallway.  Jensen turned round at the bottom of the stairs and Kerry beckoned him into the kitchen then she sat at the table with a jigsaw puzzle, swinging her legs against the chair.  All the blinds were down in the kitchen and Jared was leaning against the sink, stirring his coffee.

“Hey, what’s-“

“Shhh, daddy says it’s quiet time”, Kerry whispered to him.  Jared raised an eyebrow at him and reached behind him, threw a magazine onto the counter, oh shit, it was Esquire with a great big ole picture of him on the front.

“Jared, I can-“

Jared held up a hand, “it’s ‘quiet time’ for a reason, Jensen,” he said quietly but firmly.  “There I was, innocently opening my front door, my front door, to take the dogs for their run this morning and lo and behold, there were a dozen reporters and photographers in my face.  Besides having this thrust at me”, he stabbed the magazine with a finger, “the only thing I caught in the ten seconds it took me to slam the door closed again was ‘how do you feel about your old co-star outing himself in the national press’.”  He turned to the counter behind him and poured some coffee out, handed the mug to Jensen.  Jensen took it shakily – Jared’s calm demeanour was freaking the shit out of him.  Jared leaned against the sink once more.  “We are on ‘quiet time’ Jensen as you are not actually here, you are in LA and I apparently am a prisoner in my own home.  I had to call a friend to sneak the dogs out of the yard so they could go for their walk.  Kerry’s s’posed to be at school, I’m s’posed to be at the shelter right now.  I had to unplug the phone ‘cos it started ringing at seven this morning and hasn’t stopped.  My mom says ‘hi’ by the way.”

“Come again?”

“She was the only phone call I didn’t have to say ‘no comment’ to.  I told her you were here and she said to tell you she’s proud of you.”

“Oh.”

Jared started rapidly nodding his head, “oh?  Oh?  That it?  That’s all I’m gettin’?”

Jensen sat down on a stool and put his head down on the counter.  Where to start, where to start.  He looked up at Jared.

“Jared?  I’m gay.”

More nodding.  “Uhuh, really, well, that’s very interesting Jensen.  In fact,” he hissed at him, “it’s so damn interesting that maybe, just maybe telling me before telling Esquire might have been a good idea, hmm?”

“Jare, we haven’t spoken in years.”

“Yes and yet you knew the s-h-i-t was gonna hit the fan today and, amazingly enough, you decided that yesterday would be the perfect day to come see me, after ten years!  Tell me how that works exactly?”

“I wasn’t thinking straight?”

Jared was starting to go red in the face, “is that a question, an answer or just a really bad pun?”

“Okay, I was thinking straight.  Look, it took me a really long time to decide to do this and when I thought about who I wanted to be around when the news broke, the only person I could think of was you!  Jared, you were my best friend and I know it’s been a long time and I know I put you through hell back then but I needed to be around a friend right now, not in the middle of that cesspit in LA!”

“How long?”

“What?”

“How long have you known you were gay?”

Jensen held onto his coffee mug with both hands, “erm, well, a few years ago, I fell in love with a guy.  It completely hit me out of the blue.  I broke it off with Danneel, this thing just took me over.  It, erm, it didn’t go anywhere but my whole outlook changed.  I couldn’t commit to Danni ‘cos she wasn’t what I really needed.  So, yeh, a while.”

“So, why the magazine?”

“A while ago, someone told me to man up and, it took me a while but yeh, he was right.  My family know, so do the guys but I knew, with my name out there, telling a few people would soon turn into the many so I figured I’d get it out there as quick as possible, the ripping off a band-aid approach.  It also meant I could put across my side of everything.”

“Well, ya band-aid’s outside my house, try’na take photographs through my windows!”

“I may have underestimated the amount of interest the press would have in this.”

“Ya think?!  I just can’t believe Steve thought this’d be a good idea.”

Jensen scritch-scratched his beard, “well, I kinda didn’t tell him about the article, I only told my mom and dad and Chris.”

“Cos ya knew Steve would call you an idiot and try to talk you out of it.”

“They were interrupted by Jensen’s cellphone vibrating in his pocket.  He pulled it out and groaned at the little number 27 in the corner of the screen. He’d listen to his messages later.  He noted who was calling – impeccable timing.

“Hey Steve”, he whispered.

Jared barked out a laugh then quickly covered his mouth when Kerry scowled at him and said “shh daddy.”

“Jen, have you lost your friggin mind?!”

“And good morning to you too.”

“Where the hell are you?  There’s paps camped outside your house.”

“Erm, I’m with a friend.”

“No, you’re not! I’ve just spoken to all of them and Chris is sitting next to me in the truck.”

“Can I talk to him?”

“No, he’s sulking right now.”

“Why?”

“’Cos I punched him, that’s why!  I cannot fucking believe you two kept this from me, are you clinically insane? Where the hell are you?”

“Erm, I’m at Jared’s, in New York.”

“You’re where?”

Jensen sighed and started walking towards the hallway, then realised he couldn’t exactly step outside, so he dawdled in the kitchen doorway instead, turning his back to Jared.

“I’m at Jared’s.”

“Holy shit!  Did you tell him?”

“He kinda saw the article already.”

“Not that, you idiot!”

Jensen lowered his voice even more, “erm, no, no.”

Chris said something in the background.

“Chris said you promised you would.  Really?”

“Yeh, I was drunk.”  He snuck a peak behind him; Jared had sat down and was helping Kerry with the puzzle, blatantly listening into his conversation.  “Look, I gotta go.  Tell Chris no, I can’t and I’m sorry Steve, for not telling you.”

Steve harrumphed, “yeh, well, s’a good job it’s a balanced article and you’re damn lucky you’re on the other side of the country from me right now.”

“Don’t be too hard on Chris, okay?  He meant well and he was only doing what I asked.  I‘ll speak to you later, okay?”

“Okay, be careful with your heart Jen, okay?”

Jensen smiled at the phone, “too late Steve, way too late.”

He closed his phone and stepped back into the kitchen, put his coffee mug in the sink.

“Too late for what?”

Jensen turned round and looked at him, sitting with his arm around Kerry’s chair, a piece of blue sky in his hand.  Yep, way too late, he thought.

“Oh, nothing, too late for getting back in the closet, s’all.”

Kerry stage whispered, “why are you getting in the closet, Uncie Jensen?”

“I’m not, Kerry.  You know what?” He turned to Jared.  “This is ridiculous!”  He raised his voice to a normal level.  “You guys need to be able to leave the house at some point and this is all to do with me, so...”  He turned around, pulled off his sweatshirt, straightened his t-shirt and ran his fingers through his hair.  He moved to open the front door.

“Jensen, you can’t-“

“Watch me.”

He opened the door to a flash of cameras and shouts, and quite a few cries of ‘holy shit, he’s here’.  He pulled the door closed behind him and stood on the top step. 

“Okay guys, I’m not gonna answer any questions before I’ve had my wheaties, okay?”  He could turn on the charm when necessary.  “There’ll be a press conference at two at Soho House.  Y’all get to ask any questions then so, for now, do me a favour and leave, let Jared and his family get on with their day.  Thanks guys.”  He turned around to more bulb flashes and went back into the house.  Jared and Kerry were standing in the hallway.

Jared blinked at him, mouth agape, “I can’t believe you just did that.”

“I’ve got to go make a few calls.  Are we...are we okay?”

“Christ, stop looking so nervous, we’re okay.  I think you’ve still got a lot of explaining to do but yeh, we’re okay.  Come here.”

Jared gave him a hug but Jensen quickly pulled away.  “I’ve gotta go sort some things.”

“Yeh...okay.”

Jensen ran up the stairs and went into the bathroom, shut the door and leant over the sink, looking at himself in the mirror.  Oh shit.

 

Twenty minutes later, Jared was knocking on the door.

“Jen, you okay in there?”

Jensen moved away from the toilet bowl and sat back on the floor, against the side of the tub.

“Look, I’m coming in, okay?”  The door opened and Jensen felt Jared put a hand on his knee, crouch down next to him.  “Hey, what’s going on?”

He looked at Jared and tried not to breathe over him.  “Dunno, came in here and looked in the mirror, just hit me.  Once I’d made the decision to do it, the article I mean, I’ve been so calm since, ya know?  But I came in here and looked in the mirror and thought ‘that’s it, you’re the gay movie star now’.  Then I puked and yeh, s’about as far as I got before you came in.”

“Okay buddy, let’s get you up off the floor.”  Jared helped him up and gave him some mouthwash.  “Tell me who you need to call to set up that press call and I’ll do it.  You’re taking some alka seltzer and a nap.”

Jensen spat the mouthwash into the sink.  “I can’t, I need to-“

“Jen, ya green right now and you need to be back to your beautiful self by two so shut up n let me handle things.”  Jared steered him into a bed, one that smelt really, really good.  “Phone and your people?”

Jensen discreetly moved his arm over the sheet so Jared couldn’t see him deeply inhaling the Jared bed smell.  God, he was ridiculous sometimes.  “Erm, numbers are in my phone – Lisa my publicist, Gary my manager, Phil my agent.”

“Where’s ya phone?”

“Oh.”  He dug into his pocket.  “Here.  Thanks Jared, I mean it.”

“Okay jolly green, get some rest.”

 

After Jared had closed the door behind him, Jensen pulled the sheet up over his head and breathed in, then turned over and practically suffocated in the pillow.  This was totally worth the puking.  He was starting to feel better with every inhale of Jared’s pillow.  He wondered, as he had far too many times for his own good, what Jared slept in, if he had a favourite side, if he still snored so loud that the walls would vibrate.  The article was supposed to help him with this.  Once everyone knew, once Jared knew...God, Jensen’s stomach turned again at what he’d done, but thankfully settled back down.  It wasn’t the whole everyone knowing that got to him, it was the Jared part of that knowing.  Though, aside from being pissed that he hadn’t told him before, Jared seemed pretty okay with it.  Sadly, Jensen’s vision of Jared taking him into his arms, kissing the hell out of him then fucking him into the wall hadn’t materialised.  Yet?  Maybe?  He breathed in the Jared bed smell some more.  Jared knowing he was gay was something he’d hidden for so long, it was ingrained in his brain.  God, the bed smelt good.  It smelt like cinnamon toast, Calvin Klein aftershave and sweat, just bliss, pure Jared.  Well, he guessed that getting over the whole love thing for Jared wasn’t gonna happen anytime soon.  Technically, he hadn’t lied directly to Jared.  He had fallen in love with a guy and it hadn’t worked out.  He’d just omitted the part about the guy being Jared and that he’d fled the scene of the crime ten years ago rather than telling him how he felt.  Now, the heart pain was back and he really wasn’t sure what to do.  Maybe at least-

“Roll over, dickwad, you’re on my side.”

Jensen automatically rolled to the right and Jared lay on the bed next to him.

“Jare, what are you doing?”

“Press has cleared out, with a little help from the cops I called, called your people, all set, my neighbour Tracy’s here to take Kerry out to the park with the dogs, she has her own key, Tracy that is, not Kerry, ergo I’m getting a nap while I can.”

“Ergo?”

“Hmm, sleep Jen, you look like shit still.”  Jared got under the sheets and Jensen tried very hard not to let a squeak come out of his mouth.  Sure, technically, they were both dressed but Jared was like a furnace at the best of times.  Jesus.  Jared started lightly snoring and Jensen prodded him.

“Jare, turn on ya side, ya snoring.”

“Hmmm,” Jared turned towards Jensen and flung an arm over him.  Terrific, just fantastic.  The thing was though, the queasy feeling had stopped as soon as Jared had gotten on the bed; now the heat of his arm was practically melting Jensen into the bed.  No good would come of this, no good at all.

 

Jensen didn’t nap, he just listened to Jared napping and lightly snoring.  He thought about what he was gonna say at the press call, tried to figure out what the hell kinda questions they’d ask him that hadn’t already been answered in the article.  Tried to savor the feeling of Jared in bed next to him.  If he did ever tell him how he felt, he had to admit that being this close to him again would probably never happen.  Nah, he couldn’t do it, Jared had such an amazing life now, he had to let him get on with it.  He’d figure out a way of dampening down his feelings, he’d have to.  Hell, he’d managed it for ten years, he’d just have to try a bit harder. 

He turned on his side and watched Jared sleep, hair falling in his eyes, his lips puffing out as he breathed out, a low snore as he breathed in again.  The dark circles under his eyes from their filming days were all gone, he looked older but happier, laughter lines finally around his eyes – Jensen had been sick of being the only one of them with those.  Jared looked thinner too, but in a good way, he’d lost some of the pepped up muscle from way back.  Jared had always been fit but Jensen had worried about him for a while there after Sandy, he was always working out, day and night.  Now he looked healthy and toned, no longer aiming for muscle man status.  He listened to Jared breathing and eventually he was breathing in the same pattern, eyes fluttering closed, Kerry’s words ‘as snug as a bug’ pulling him into sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Chad saves the day!

Jensen fiddled with the window button as he sat in the back of the town car, the city looming in front of him over the bridge.  He didn’t feel quite ready for this.  An article in Esquire felt distant, remote from his audience.  The press call would bring him smack up against the outside world, open to any kind of insinuation or attack.  Least he looked decent, no longer feeling green either.  He’d woken up alone and heard Kerry’s excited chatter downstairs.  She’d run upstairs just as he’d got out of bed and launched herself at him for a hug, completely unfazed that he was in her daddy’s bedroom.  Not that anything had gone on anyway.  They went into the guestroom and Jensen went to wash his face while Jared and Kerry picked clothes out of his bag.  When he came back from the bathroom, Jared was holding out a dark gray shirt and black pants.

“We unpacked for you, “ he said, “as you forgot to do it last night.”

Jensen kept his focus on Kerry as he took the clothes, in no way keen to see the disappointed look on Jared’s face.

“We picked out socks as well”, Kerry said and held them out for him, one on the end of each small hand.

“Thanks munchkin.”

“Daddy said you’re gonna be on TV today, is that true?”

Jensen swallowed back some bile, “yeh, it is.”

“Come on babycheeks, let’s let Jensen get dressed.”  Jared ushered Kerry out the door and gently smiled back at Jensen.  “Your car’ll be here in fifteen.”

 

Now, he was fast approaching Soho House, leaving Jared with his promise that they wouldn’t watch E News.

“Nearly there, Mr Ackles,” the driver called back to him.

“Okay, thanks.”  He wiped his palms on the leather seat, pulled on the jelly bracelet on his right wrist that Jared had given to him, ‘for luck’, he’d said.  He could do this, he was a gay movie star now, time to face the music.

The car pulled up to camera flashes and he waited for the driver to open the door before he attempted to get through the crowd.

“Jensen, Jensen, over here!”

“Jensen, is Clooney gay?”

“Jensen!”

“Jensen, you fag!”

Jensen quickly walked through the crowd, tried not to wince at that last shout.  He’d have to get used to taking shit like that.  Ken, his East Coast agent, was waiting for him in the hotel lobby and they quickly walked towards the elevators together.

“Jensen, hell of a day, young man.”  He slapped him on the back.

Jensen turned to him, “why do you look so happy?”

“Jen, did you not even watch the news?  You were the twelve o’clock breaking story.  What the hell are you doing in New York?”

“Erm, hiding, well, I was until this morning.  I just wanted to let the article speak for itself.”  He rubbed the back of his neck as they got into the elevator and Ken pressed the second floor button.

“Should have done a better job of hiding then!  I found out a couple told the press; they wanted to find out why one of the country’s top movie stars was sitting outside a brownstone in Brooklyn.”

Shit, so much for anonymity in Brooklyn.

“Though personally I’m amazed the Grizzly Adams look didn’t fool them.”

Jensen rubbed at his beard, “yeh, I’ll remember my aviators next time, go for the full lunatic look.”

Ken slapped him on the back again, “attaboy!  It’s that sense of humor that’ll get you through this.  Most of the mainstreams are here but so are some gossip websites who are probably after blood.”

“Great.”

The elevator doors opened on the second floor and they walked down the corridor to a set of double doors.

“You ready?”

Jensen took a deep breath and let it out slowly, “no.”

Ken just kept grinning at him, “fabulous!  Let’s go.”

Ken opened the doors and Jensen walked in with his back straight and his best movie star face on.  He was shown to a top table and he sat down then looked up at the packed conference room, leaned forward to the mike and said “okay everyone, let’s keep this clean” with a sparkle in his eyes.

 +++

 

The press call had gone as fine as could be expected until the last few minutes when a question about Daneel rattled him.  Now Ken was asking for the last question and Jensen was starting to get that pukey feeling back again.

“Yes”, Ken pointed to the back of the room where there was press standing amongst the TV cameras, “you, at the back.”

“Charles from Murray News.”

Jensen’s head snapped up, that bastard!  He refused to let frickin’ Chad rattle him and just smirked back at him, “what’s your question, Charles?”

“Is it true that you are in love with your former co-star, Jared Padalecki?”

The room went very quiet and ten TV cameras focused on him, rows of reporters’ faces lighting up expectantly.

“Yes, it’s true.”  Holy shit! No! He’d meant to say no!  Fuckin’ Murray, he was gonna kill him!

Ken looked towards him with a frown then smiled back at the room, “that’s it folks, thanks for coming.”  He poked Jensen in the side to get him moving and the stunned silence of the press quickly turned into a flurry of camera flashes and questions being shouted at him as he left the room.  “Come on, we’ve got a suite down the hall.”

Jensen was pushed into a room and he flopped down on the nearest couch.  He looked up at Ken, “what did I just do?”

“I think you just declared your love for the sasquatch to most of the country’s press.”

“Ohshitohshitohshitohshit.”

“Here.”  Ken thrust a drink into his hand and he bolted it down.  There was a knock at the door and Jensen caught Ken’s “oh great” as he opened the door.  He looked up from his empty glass and Chad was standing over him.

“You fuckin’ asshole!”  He surged up and punched Chad in the face, the stupid idiot tottering back a few feet with his hands up.

“Fuck, Jensen, chill, seriously chill!” Ken hissed at him.  He grabbed Jensen and held onto him before he could land another punch on that smarmy face.  “Jensen, quiet down, there’s press all over the hotel still.  Calm down, calm down, sit down, both of you.” 

Ken pushed Jensen on to one end of the couch, pushed Chad onto the other end.  They musta looked like two schoolboys waiting to see the principal after they’d egged his car.  He looked over at Chad, who was rubbing his cheek and holding an empty glass against it. 

“Why’d ya do that? Why?”

“’Cos I knew you wouldn’t”, Chad squinted at him.

“Chad-“

“Jensen, shut up...please.”  Chad’s manners stunned him into shutting up and he settled back into the couch.  “Man, I couldn’t believe it when I saw your article this morning, nearly choked on my egg whites!  But you’re such a chickenshit, Jensen.  You didn’t mention him anywhere in it.  Then I see on the news that not only are you in New York, but you’re at Jared’s.  Goddammit Jensen, Jared and Kerry don’t deserve a chickenshit.”

“Chad, you’ve finally cracked”, Jensen said, shaking his head, “I don’t deserve them at all, that’s why I didn’t tell him.”

Chad put his head in his hands and took a deep breath, mumbled a bit, scraped his hands through his hair and looked over at Jensen again. 

“Okay Jensen, I’m only going to say this once – let.your.life.happen.  Please, for all our sakes.  Get up, go outside and get in the car and just, just get on with it!”

Jensen frowned, “Chad, ya being weirder than normal.”

“God give me strength”, he muttered then stood up and pulled Jensen to his feet.  “Ken, if you would be so kind?”  Ken just raised an eyebrow then helped Chad push Jensen towards the door.

“Ken!” Jensen spluttered at him.

“I never, and I do really mean never, thought I’d say these words Jensen but, Chad has a point.  What are you going to do, hide in this room forever?”

“If it’s got cable, hell yes!”

Chad pushed him out the door and into the elevator, remaining grim faced as he and Ken stood either side of him watching the floor numbers go down.  Then they each interlocked an arm and frogmarched him through the lobby, shielded him from the crowd outside and shoved him into the waiting car.  Jensen stared out of the window as Chad winked at him then banged on the roof for the driver to get going.  The sudden quiet of the car was overwhelming.  He seemed to have spent his entire afternoon being shoved around.

“Hi there.”

Jensen jumped out of his skin as he turned to the interior of the car, “holy sh-“

A big hand clamped over his mouth, “now, now, none of that language, Kerry’s in the front.”  Jared took his hand away and Jensen just stared at him, wide eyed, as Jared moved forward and pushed the divider button.  “How ya doing, pumpkin?”

“Daddy, did you see all those people?”

“Yes honey, I did.  Are you okay up here?”

Jensen couldn’t see Kerry in the front passenger seat but he had a great view of Jared’s ass in front of him.  Jesus.

“Yes, daddy.  Daddy, can we listen to the story CD John has?  He keeps it for his nieces and it’s Cinderella and you know it’s the best story ever.”

“Sure, I’m gonna put this screen back up so I can talk to your uncie, okay babycheeks?”

Jensen couldn’t hear her reply but figured it was in the affirmative as Jared pushed the divider back up.  He sat back and turned to Jensen, put his arm along the back of the seat like it was so many times when they’d travelled home from set together.

“So, ya probably wondering what’s going on?”  Jensen managed to dumbly nod.  “Chad called just after you’d left for the hotel, said he was sending a car round, wouldn’t say why, ordered us to stay in the car and wait for you, said you’d need the support.  So, we’re sitting here, messing around and John puts the news on, only I don’t get a chance to tell him to shut it off before Chad’s dumbass voice comes over the air asking you if you’re in love with me and I’ll be damned if ya didn’t say yes.  Kerry asked me what you meant and I said you meant you’d be her Uncie Jensen forever and that you’d be sleeping over again tonight.”

“Jared, I-“

Jared put a finger over his lips then, once he was sure Jensen was going to stay quiet, he brought his arm down from the back of the seat and wrapped it round Jensen, pulling him closer and grabbing his hands out of Jensen’s lap and against his chest.

“Jensen, when I met you, I fell a l’il bit in love with you right then, as I shook ya hand.  That never changed, it only got bigger.  But life got in the way, you know?  Since Gen, you’re all I’ve thought about.  Ya wanted to know why that picture’s still on the mantel?  ‘Cos I love looking at you in it.  Kerry started hearing about Uncie Jensen when she was one and a half.  We follow all the news about you, I pathetically go and watch all your movies.  I dunno, life banged me around a bit but it never pushed you out of the place you’d wedged in my heart.  I couldn’t let you go.  I didn’t want to, just kept hoping you’d magically see it.”  He took a deep breath.  “Okay, you can speak now.”

Jensen realised he was crying when his words got caught in his throat.  “So...so, if I hadn’t turned up on your doorstep yesterday?”

“I’d’ve carried on ignoring it, pushing it all down and just ploughing on through.”

Jensen pulled his hand back.  “Jare, I need to tell you something else...”

“You slept with Chad, I know,” Jared rolled his eyes; “he blurted it out when he called.  Jen, Chad’s slept with everyone.  Were you at least drunk?”

“Yeh, and he called us both idiots when I left, I’ve just realised he meant both of us, not just me.”

“Yeh, he’s been calling me an idiot for a while now and I got a few more of them when he called today.”

“So...erm, now what?”

“Well, I guess this for starters.”  Jared leaned in and kissed him gently.

Wow, Jensen had seriously been missing out for ten years, he thought, as he deepened the kiss.  A few minutes later, he leant back “okay, yeh, that’s a pretty good start.”

“That kiss right there, that’s the start of all the best love stories, Jensen, every one.”

As the car trundled across the bridge, Jared pulled Jensen down against him to lie along the seat and, with Jared’s heartbeat under his ear and Kerry’s giggling in the front seat, Jensen realised his hiding days were way past over.

**The end.**


End file.
